SG1 Drabbles
by everg8er23
Summary: A collection of hopefully funny drabbles featuring our favorite team. Chapter 2 added: Do I look fat in this?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Just borrowing.

Jack O'Neill was sitting at his desk, his head bent over a file folder, his forehead creased in concentration. While this scene my have fooled anyone who did not personally know the colonel into believing that he was studiously doing the paperwork that was piled precariously on his desktop, any person that knew Jack well, even someone who did not know him well at all and had only shook his hand on one occasion and exchanged the necessary pleasantries, anyone in actuality, who had seen the colonel in person, would have a sneaking suspicion that while it appeared that Jack was doing his work, his mind was really off in another galaxy chasing aliens or sitting on a beach in Hawaii relaxing to the soothing sounds of Italian opera.

When Daniel Jackson entered the room and saw Jack at his desk, he was at first taken aback by the site, but almost immediately decided that if Jack appeared like he was doing work then it almost certain that if he looked so convincing, it was because he was trying to look convincing.

Daniel came across the room and stood in front of the desk, waiting for Jack to acknowledge his presence. About ten seconds later, Daniel gave up the attempt as futile and knocked on the desktop. Jack still didn't say anything which confirmed Daniel's suspicion that he was not doing paperwork and rather letting his mind wander. Trying to be as annoying as possible Daniel grabbed the piece of paper under Jack's nose, "Whatcha readin'?"

"I've got no idea."

"That's surprising."

"Did you want something?" Jack asked snatching back the paper as if he was mortally offended that Daniel dare take it from him.

"Actually I need a favor." Daniel felt a blush spread up his neck, making his face uncomfortably warm.

"Sure, what is it buddy?" Jack was obviously dying for a distraction from all of his hard work.

"I… uh, need you to smell me." Daniel's voice couldn't have been any softer.

"What was that?"

"I need you to tell me if I stink." His voice a bit louder this time.

"What?" Daniel was getting one of Jack's what-are-you-on-about looks.

"Jack, would you just smell me."

"Uh, why?"

Daniel said something completely incoherent then started to blush again. Why-oh-why hadn't he just asked Sam? By the look Jack was giving him he knew he wasn't going to get an answer unless he spat out the whole story. "A water pipe broke at my apartment building and I couldn't wash my hands let alone take a shower. And this morning when I was walking down the halls more than one person was skirting around me and rubbing their nose. I actually had one female airman come up to me and say I should look into soap."

At this Jack started chuckling, Daniel, having been expecting this just stood and waited. As the laughing abated, Daniel barely containing his frustration whined, "Do I smell or not?"

Jack stood slowly, looked Daniel in the eye and said, "You stink Daniel, why don't you just use the base showers?"


	2. Do I look fat in this?

A/N: I don't know if this is any better than my first chapter, but I thought I'd post anyway. Let me know what you think, reviews are greatly appreciated, even if only to say you hate it. (Just let me know why.)

By the way, the italics are Jack's thoughts, if that's not obvious.

* * *

"Do I look fat in this?" 

Jack looked up from his magazine, surprised by the question. "Of course not, you always look great."

"Really? Even in the green BDUs?"

"Green isn't really anyone's color." Jack said, wondering where this conversation was going.

"I suppose."

"Why so self-conscious all of a sudden?" This was so unlike his teammate.

"Need to know."

"Oh really, well as your CO I think you can tell me." _You can't blame a guy for being curious. _

"I'm not sure."

"Oh would you just tell me? I can keep a secret." _Well, usually._

"Yeah…."

"Hey!"

"So, I'll see you."

"What! You still haven't told me." _You're not going to weasel out of this that easily._

"I know."

"C'mon."

"I've got a date."

"No…" Jack was stunned.

"Yes."

"Since when did you get a life?"

"I've always had a life."

"Uh huh." _If you call tinkering with ancient artifacts a life._

"You act as though you haven't noticed."

"Who are you going out with?"

"Now that you don't need to know."

"What if you get… Fine, I don't have a good reason." _Smooth one O'Neill._

"Okay, bye."

"Wait, so where you going?" Jack received a death glare. "Okay never mind!"

"See you tomorrow."

"Knock her dead Daniel."


End file.
